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Secrets of 9/11 (Recently unclassified!)

Spaiku! (CIA haiku poetry from the Covert Comic! "Spooky" - USA Today)

Black Matters (The world's most classified poetry)

Intelligence Underground (Spookiest of the spooks)

Form 22C: Questioning Authority

Intelligence Agents (Classified links and communiqués)

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The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing


(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

Life is a denied area.

  Those who would trade freedom for security deserve neither.  At least hold out for faster downloads.

  I like watching House Hunters – especially when they kill, dress and skin the house.

  I assume the phrase "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything" is a nice thing to say. Real Men Don't Get Published

  I never thought about it that way before.  But now that you mention it, I don't believe I'll think about it that way ever.

Executive Intelligence Summary

When John le Carré said blackmail was more effective than bribery, he was paid off.




If you see something, CIA something.

  In my opinion, the White House should modify its position on intelligence reform.  My recommendation: the Downward-Facing Dog pose.

  Lightsaber User Manual, Section  7, Note 7.52.5.  Never look into the emitter matrix of your lightsaber to see if it's functioning properly.

  I quit my job at the zoo.  It was a zoo.

  If being kind is more important than being right, how about not saying this constantly???

Executive Intelligence Summary

Eternity merely postpones the inevitable. – Catwalk of Spies




There's plausible denial, but there's no such thing as plausible confirmation.

  If he'd gotten the government job he was hoping to obtain by writing it, Machiavelli would have redacted 98% of The Prince.

  SpookSpeak.  News n.  Fake fake news.

  Everything truly valuable that I possess is in books (ever since I read 'How to Make a Hollow Book' on Wikihow).

  All statistics are vital.

Executive Intelligence Summary

Who seeks a scapegoat may find a scapeodile.


The Covert Comic officially isn't on Twitter.



Blow Your Cover!

Nothing says "I can neither confirm nor deny that I regularly read the Covert Comic" like a genuine Covert Comic bumper sticker.

Create your own covert action!  [Officially don’t] purchase and affix these stickers to the bumpers of CIA or FBI counterintelligence officers’ cars, street signs in heavily traveled areas of Georgetown, cubicles at the Defense Intelligence Agency, the back of Air Force One, etc.

Stickers are standard 3x10 inch, full color, and are shipped promptly and secretively via First-Class Mail (no shipping fee!).  Price: $10.  Allow 2-3 weeks for delivery.

(Note: An ultra-classified portion of proceeds from the sale of Covert Comic bumper stickers goes to Fisher House, a tax deductible charity providing lodging and other support to families of wounded US military personnel.  ... And you're right, lady, I am arrogant and self-serving.)





Can't we all just coexist?







The Covert Comic.

Read him while you still can!