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The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing


(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

Some hopes soar, others slither.

  As an old school CIA ops officer, I was worried about whether I could function in today's digitalized intelligence world.  But ever since I took that Agency training course on how to get a virtual machine drunk, I'm doing fine!

  Is it 'overthink' or 'over-think'?

  In former times, history was written in blood.  Today, using digital laser technology, freeze-dried blood particles in pre-packaged cartridges are printed onto a page electrostatically. – Universal Intelligence Estimate

  To rise to the rank of entertainment executive, I bet you have to be really, really fun.

Executive Intelligence Summary

Once you read between the first couple of lines, everything after that is basically redundant.




Given a choice between two evils, that's already three.

  From military officer, to president, to whiskey distiller, the career of George Washington can be characterized as one of continuous improvement.

  Every film produced in Hollywood is post-apocalyptic by definition.

  It was always my parents' expectation that I would attend college one day.  But I surprised them and stayed for nearly a week.

  You complete me.  You complete-me destroy my life.

Executive Intelligence Summary

An intelligence estimate will tend to generate greater interest if key sections are partially disclosed prior to publication (especially if they jiggle a little).The Naked Intelligence Officer




The answer is secret the question is top secret codeword.

  Secret 840112.  The memoir of the writing of a CIA memoir would contain more intrigue by far.

  To understand the central limit theorem in probability is sufficient to refute virtually any conspiracy theory – but it requires a conspiracy to understand the central limit theorem. – Universal Intelligence Estimate

  How am I supposed to feel motivated to attend the empowerment seminar, unless I feel empowered to attend the motivational seminar???

  'Contradiction in terms' is a redundancy.

Executive Intelligence Summary

I can find the needle, I just need some help locating the haystack.


The Covert Comic officially isn't on Twitter.



The Covert Comic.

Read him while you still can!