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The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing

 

(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

NOCONTRACT NOT RELEASABLE TO CONTRACTORS/CONSULTANTS (YOU KNOW, SEEING AS HOW THOSE CONTRACTORS/CONSULTANTS PROVIDED THE INTEL IN THE FIRST PLACE).

  A typical deception operation consists of a mix of active and passive deception measures – 'assive' deception, if you will.

  Interpersonal skills are like database management systems: being a good listener is about routing incoming requests to an appropriate service handler.

  Last night I questioned my belief in God.  But my belief in God had an airtight alibi.

  Ignorance is blissinformation. Universal Intelligence Estimate

Motivational Secret of the Week

 

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Freedom is not free.  But if it consents to electronic monitoring, freedom may be released to home confinement.

  At CIA, our goal is a world where nothing is classified Secret.  Just Top Secret, and Controlled Unclassified Information.

  Don't refer to employees as 'resources,' refer to them as people.  The word 'people' contains 3 less characters, which saves on data storage costs.

  I'm a polymath.  I've slept with a statistics major and a topology major at the same time.

   I could never bring myself to delete a deceased relative from my contact list.  So I just leave all my relatives off.

PostTopSecret of the Week

From PostTopSecret

           

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Order of battle?  If it's OK with you, I'll go last.

  Intelligence Community Dis of the Day.  Her cover has been compromising.

  The fact that someone disagrees with me doesn't make that person evil or stupid.  To disagree with me they would have to be evil or stupid already.

  I could never have sex without love because I love sex!

  In the interest of safety, shouldn't everything come with a self-destruct button? My War on Terror!

Executive Intelligence Summary

Power corrupts, but the power of positive thinking corrupts positively.

                                     

The Covert Comic officially isn't on Twitter.

 

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The Covert Comic.

Read him while you still can!