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The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing

 

(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

You can't make this stuff up.  Making this stuff up is a violation of Title 18, Section 1001 of US federal law.

●  I strongly support creation of the United States Space Force, and I am prepared to nominate several officials for immediate deployment.

●  A mnemonic verse to help one remember not to commit genocide:

Only a creep'll

Annihilate a people

  You've got to take the sweet with the sucralose.

  It's not the illusion of reality that need persist, only the illusion of persistence. – Real Men Don't Get Published

Executive Intelligence Summary

The saying 'See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil' omits several important orifices.

 

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The bean counts the bean counters.

●  The CIA and Iran's Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps: What You Need to Know.

You do not have a need to know about the CIA and Iran's Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps.

●  If a butterfly flapping its wings can cause a hurricane in China, you'd think we could get four or five butterflies and do something about the trade deficit.

●  Horror motifs are specific to their generation.  Back in my day, an image of pale, hollow-eyed twin girls standing motionless holding hands wasn't called 'scary,' it was called 'being at a free concert.'

●  The thought of machines becoming self-aware is frightening – because it means I might have to become self-aware too.

Executive Intelligence Summary

The naked truth has stretch marks. The Naked Intelligence Officer

                     

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In a leap year, 96 additional people get their 15 minutes of fame.

  Intelligence discipline?  I find timeouts work pretty well.

  A word of warning if you go to see an opera: it's NOT necessarily over when the fat lady sings.

  We learn genealogy the morning after an earthquake.

… What?  It's 'geology?'

That too. 

  I bet whoever said "The future is now!" feels like a total idiot today. My War on Terror!

PostTopSecret of the Week

from PostTopSecret

 

The Covert Comic officially isn't on Twitter.

 

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The Covert Comic.

Read him while you still can!