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The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing

 

 

(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

CIA officers feint at the site of blood.

SpookSpeak. Collection posture n. The configuration of assets deployed for the purpose of satisfying collection needs (if you know what I’m officially not saying).

● Instead of screaming ‘Gooooooooal,’ shouldn't soccer announcers say ‘Achieeeeeevement’?

● We traveled forty miles as the crow flies.

Which is to say my wife spent the whole time cawing.

● Most books are better than the movie, even when there’s no book.

Executive Intelligence Summary

As if the right hand knew what the right hand was doing.

                       

*

     

Airspace control starts between the ears.

● Host country’s irregular military could definitely use a strong antidiarrheal. – Ops report

● Lab-Grown Penis Tissue Raises Hard, Throbbing Ethical Questions

● When Thomas Edison said ‘Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration,’ I bet he really sweated the wording.

● It’s ‘yin-yang,’ not ‘yang-yin?’

Damn, not this universe again.

Executive Intelligence Summary

A date with destiny is never Dutch treat.

    

*

 

 

Recruit for the foreign head of state you want, not the foreign head of state you have.

● He died doing what he loves. – Cover eulogy for NOC officer

● A leading seller of testosterone boosters is offering a free brain supplement with each order. Is this good marketing? If the brain supplement works, how many guys will keep purchasing testosterone boosters???

● Halfway through the dictionary’s definition of ‘unreliable narrator,’ doubts start creeping in.

● The difference between free markets and neocolonialism is a matter of degree. Specifically, whether anyone’s hiring people with yours.

Executive Intelligence Summary

If the dumpster’s on fire, might as well toss in your trash.

  

               

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