The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing

(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

NOCONTRACT – NOT RELEASABLE TO CONTRACTORS/CONSULTANTS (YOU KNOW, SEEING AS HOW THOSE CONTRACTORS/CONSULTANTS PROVIDED THE INTEL IN THE FIRST PLACE).

●  A typical deception operation consists of a mix of active and passive deception measures – 'assive' deception, if you will.

●  Interpersonal skills are like database management systems: being a good listener is about routing incoming requests to an appropriate service handler.

●  Last night I questioned my belief in God.  But my belief in God had an airtight alibi.

●  Ignorance is blissinformation. – Universal Intelligence Estimate

Motivational Secret of the Week

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Freedom is not free.  But if it consents to electronic monitoring, freedom may be released to home confinement.

●  At CIA, our goal is a world where nothing is classified Secret.  Just Top Secret, and Controlled Unclassified Information.

●  Don't refer to employees as 'resources,' refer to them as people.  The word 'people' contains 3 less characters, which saves on data storage costs.

●  I'm a polymath.  I've slept with a statistics major and a topology major at the same time.

●   I could never bring myself to delete a deceased relative from my contact list.  So I just leave all my relatives off.

PostTopSecret of the Week

From PostTopSecret

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Order of battle?  If it's OK with you, I'll go last.

●  Intelligence Community Dis of the Day.  Her cover has been compromising.

●  The fact that someone disagrees with me doesn't make that person evil or stupid.  To disagree with me they would have to be evil or stupid already.

●  I could never have sex without love – because I love sex!

●  In the interest of safety, shouldn't everything come with a self-destruct button? – My War on Terror!

Executive Intelligence Summary

Power corrupts, but the power of positive thinking corrupts positively.