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The Covert Comic Weekly Intelligence Briefing
(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)
SpookSpeak.
Shore party n. 1. (USN) The naval element of a beach operation.
2. (CIA) The navel element of same. ● What area? – When asked if the site
surrounded by a fenced, patrolled perimeter was a denied area ● Anybody can demand a seat at the table. But
you better be good at animating smiley faces in PowerPoint. ● Solution to the ethical dilemma of whether a
self-driving car should save the lives of its passengers or the lives of
pedestrians: make the tiebreaker the shortest traffic delay. ● You were only trying to be polite about my
synesthesia. I smell that now.
Executive
Intelligence Summary You say ‘kiss it and make it better’ like
they’re not mutually exclusive.
At CIA,
terminating an intelligence asset does not mean killing them (and
occasionally vice versa). ● Fighter pilots: sign up to attend a
presentation on the latest trends in aircraft ejection systems. Seats
going fast! – Announcement in Pentagon news publication (proposed) ● The Force is litigable with this one. –
Imperial and Jedi lawyers alike ● You know you’re driving in the country when
the voices on radio ad disclaimers talk slower than you do. ● I assume the
statement “If you can't say something nice, don’t say anything”
Executive
Intelligence Summary A single candle can burn brighter than the
largest bonfire. … Well, brighter in its own way. OK fine, pretty bright then. Also, why do you
have to be so critical of everything???
As a general rule, a general shouldn’t. –
[Context and station classified] ● SpookSpeak. Go/No-No-Go n.
A meeting to determine whether
to proceed with a planned action, or not to proceed with not proceeding
with that action. ● Sweden. Because the world needs an emotional
support country.
● Halfway
through the dictionary’s definition of ‘unreliable narrator,’ doubts
start creeping in. ● Life is too short to have more than 1/7 of a
human. – Dog wisdom
Executive
Intelligence Summary
We're all on our
deathbed, but some of us are jumping up and down on the mattress.
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