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The Covert Comic Weekly Intelligence Briefing
(Note: Cleared readers only, please.) One upside of climate change: less cold for a
spy to come in from.
●
SpookSpeak. SINGINT n.
Singles intelligence. Information collected by unattached CIA officers
regarding other unattached CIA officers. Sometimes confused with SIGINT
(signals intelligence), the two disciplines being similar in
pronunciation and sharing numerous common practices.
● Eating lunch
BEFORE I go to the cattle auction today. Not making the same mistake
this time.
● If I was one of
those patients who saw visible healing of their intestinal lining, I’d
be like ‘Thank you sooo much, but ew.’ ● It can’t be a midlife crisis if it kills you
instantly.
Executive
Intelligence Summary
You say
‘psychosexual’ like there’s some other kind.
When managing a stable of agents, the case
officer’s approach will typically vary based on whether a given asset
has been recruited for racing, dressage, or breeding purposes.
●
Once hope was the
thing with feathers That perched inside the soul Now hope’s the thing that hovers
And fires
missiles by remote control
● A valuable step
in one’s career development is learning to see co-workers from new
perspectives (for example, this ceiling air duct vent).
● You’d think
more mycologists would have a spirit fungus. ● Last night my wife and I had dinner at a
Chinese restaurant. When they brought us our fortune cookies, my fortune
had nothing but a skull and crossbones on it. My wife got scared, but I
think the fortune was just saying I have a lucky skeleton.
Executive
Intelligence Summary When unleashing your inner dragon, always have an approved, readily accessible fire extinguisher.
I enjoy extremely
short walks on the beach. – Navy SEAL personal ad, US military dating
site
●
Supporting the
mission of America’s Space Force will require space-related HUMINT
collection by an elite corps of space case officers.
● My new
girlfriend has daddy issues. She’s the worst father I’ve ever had.
● In my opinion,
50 Cent is way better than Eminem, since you can get a bunch of Eminems
with 50 Cent. ● Albert Einstein said: “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.” Well here’s one mediocre mind that thinks we ought to give Einstein’s ideas a fair hearing.
Executive
Intelligence Summary You say ‘dummy round’ like there’s some other
kind.
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